Postpartum depression and anxiety… even typing those words I just want to erase them because it feels like I just admitted something bad. The truth is it is a topic many people don’t talk about and is embarrassing for some reason?
I’m about 11 month PP and still struggling with it from time to time. I never thought this would be my life and I’m not on the “I want to kill myself” spectrum but I def have some blues and anxiety.
This has been the hardest year of my life! I feel like it can only get easier. A colic baby, I think would send any sane person into depression.. seriously someone needs to find a cure for that (if that’s possible lol). Some days u just want to cry and you’re not even sure why. Other days it’s not sadness but just wanting to get away and have a different life. But mostly it’s just feelings of seriously what am I doing with my life??? Not feeling like yourself and if I have to hear crying for another minute I might snap. Having zero energy to invest in other people but feeling bad for not. When you get out of your pjs and do your hair and makeup.. it’s a good day.
Wish I could say here are all of the things I did to get over it, but for now I’m just in it. Instead of always posting how peachy great life is, sometimes it’s not.
That doesn’t mean I don’t see the blessings in my life though! Like my child who I am obsessed with even if he makes life hard and a loving husband, family that cares, a cozy house and even my God who sees me right now and listens to me complain about this aspect of my life when he has given me so much, but I think he understands where I’m at.
For any mom out there going through the same thing, I feel ya.